backnees.mp3
Melvin: Quit worrying. You'll be back on your knees in no time.
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bettrman.mp3
Carol: Pay me a compliment, Melvin. I need one.
Melvin: You make me want to be a better man.
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bignoses.mp3
Melvin: Appetites aren't as big as your noses, huh?
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boyfrend.mp3
Carol: Why can't I just have a normal boyfriend?! Why!? Just a regular boyfriend! One who doesn't go nuts on me.
Carol's Mom: Everyone wants that dear. It doesn't exist.
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bradpitt.mp3
Street Model: Brad Pitt..d...d..d..The shit!
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crotch.mp3
Melvin: People who talk in metaphors outta shampoo my crotch.
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disorder.mp3
Melvin: Dr. Green, how can you diagnose someone as an obsessive compulsive disorder and then act as if I had some choice about barging in?
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dontknok.mp3
Melvin: Or, if it's election night, and you're excited and you want to celebrate, because some fudgepacker you date was elected the first queer president of the United States, and he's going to have you down to Camp David, and you want someone to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not on this door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me sweetheart?
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eatdiapr.mp3
Simon: Where was my little baby? Where was my baby? Maintenance man: In the basement garbage bin eating diaper shit.
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erection.mp3
Melvin: Can I ask you a personal question?
Simon: Sure.
Melvin: Ever get an erection over a woman?
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