backnees.mp3Melvin: Quit worrying. You'll be back on your knees in no
bettrman.mp3Carol: Pay me a compliment, Melvin. I need one.
Melvin: You make me want to be a better man.
bignoses.mp3Melvin: Appetites aren't as big as your noses, huh?
boyfrend.mp3Carol: Why can't I just have a normal boyfriend?! Why!? Just
a regular boyfriend! One who doesn't go nuts on me.
Carol's Mom: Everyone wants that dear. It doesn't exist.
bradpitt.mp3Street Model: Brad Pitt..d...d..d..The shit!
crotch.mp3Melvin: People who talk in metaphors outta shampoo my
disorder.mp3Melvin: Dr. Green, how can you diagnose someone as an
obsessive compulsive disorder and then act as if I had some
choice about barging in?
dontknok.mp3Melvin: Or, if it's election night, and you're excited and you
want to celebrate, because some fudgepacker you date was
elected the first queer president of the United States, and he's
going to have you down to Camp David, and you want someone
to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not on this
door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me sweetheart?
eatdiapr.mp3Simon: Where was my little baby? Where was my baby?
Maintenance man: In the basement garbage bin eating
erection.mp3Melvin: Can I ask you a personal question?
Melvin: Ever get an erection over a woman?